"I know rules are a bore but just to keep you from danger I am the law"

So in a frankly bizarre turn of events it looks like I’m going to Essex tomorrow to see Rainbow Girl. Cool, you never know I might just get laid! I only have 4 days to go to stop it from being a year with no action. That statement may belie my affection for Rainbow Girl; I like her a lot & feel her to be a bit of a kindred spirit.
With that in mind I better outline my manifesto now as I may well be too busy tomorrow & the whole point of this trip was to sort my life out. So here goes: the 10 commandments of Flash. Actually before I lay down the laws one thing must be noted. The Boy overrides everything. The Boy is & always shall be my first priority. Ok here goes
1.ACT
I have fucked up so much of my life because of not acting upon things that I should have. I can no longer allow this to happen, I must act upon things. This is crucial & that’s why it’s law No.1.
2.DRUGS – A TIME & A PLACE.
I can’t help but think that a lot of my mental decline has been down to the amount of dope I’ve been smoking. Now I love getting stoned but from now on it shall only be consumed when it’s appropriate. So no more joints at 3 o clock on a Tuesday afternoon.
3.THE UNSPEAKABLE LAW.
I know what it is & I know what I have to do. I shall make a grand gesture of closure tomorrow before I leave Wales.
4.DEFINE WHAT I WANT TO DO
Throughout my life I have had lots of dreams about what I want to do or who I want to be. I see the need to define these dreams & either follow them or consign them to the bin.
5.STOP BEING BONE-FUCKING-IDLE.
Laziness is my nemesis. It has cost me so much in my life. I can’t allow it to cost me anything else. That’s why I pushed myself into climbing a mountain today. I have to fight laziness at every opportunity because it needs burying.
6.BE CLEAN
7.USE MY GIFTS
In conjunction with laws 1, 4, & 5, I clearly need to use the skills I possess because, frankly, a lot of people aren’t so lucky. I have a great singing voice, an ear for a fine melody & a way with words that can serve me as a lyricist, a writer & also as a conversationalist. I must be proud of these gifts & use them accordingly.
8.WOMEN MUST NOT RULE MY LIFE
As anyone who knows me well enough would tell you, all logic goes out of the window where women are concerned. This is flawed & has cost me dear time & time again. The pursuit of love must not detract from or obstruct everything else in my life.
9.SET AIMS
I should set aims on a regular basis & try to achieve them. This can only lead to success.
10.FUCK IT!
I am a big fan of spontaneity. There are times in life when you have to say “fuck it” & go with whatever feels right at the time. The fuck it law can be applied, albeit sparingly, to everything except law 3.

So that’s it, these guidelines come into force as of the moment I open my eyes tomorrow morning & shall stay in place until I pop my clogs.