"All you defeatists raise your hands"
To whomever it may concern,
I, Flash of Crapsville, hereby give 48 hours notice of my intention to desist from having non-platonic relationships with women. I feel that over the past 19 years I have given loyal & diligent service to womenkind, however I have become tired of the pretence, the futility &, most of all, the rejection. I feel my life will be much more fulfilling if I concentrate my energies on more rewarding activities such as making music & becoming a better blogger. I take with me many fond memories of my time involved with affairs of the heart & I hope some of the ladies whose lives I have touched will be able to look back & feel a similar fondness. All that remains is to thank those few whose faith has remained & wish the rest of the men better luck than I've had.
Yours defeatedly,
Flash
PS. I'm fine, thanks for asking.
PPS. What's the difference between an egg & a wank?
You can beat an egg! *Badum teesh*
I, Flash of Crapsville, hereby give 48 hours notice of my intention to desist from having non-platonic relationships with women. I feel that over the past 19 years I have given loyal & diligent service to womenkind, however I have become tired of the pretence, the futility &, most of all, the rejection. I feel my life will be much more fulfilling if I concentrate my energies on more rewarding activities such as making music & becoming a better blogger. I take with me many fond memories of my time involved with affairs of the heart & I hope some of the ladies whose lives I have touched will be able to look back & feel a similar fondness. All that remains is to thank those few whose faith has remained & wish the rest of the men better luck than I've had.
Yours defeatedly,
Flash
PS. I'm fine, thanks for asking.
PPS. What's the difference between an egg & a wank?
You can beat an egg! *Badum teesh*
And that's what Flash thinks today @ 18:15
9 Comments:
At 6:31 pm,
Erika said…
You alright, Flash? This seems a rather destitute proclamation.
At 6:42 pm,
HistoryGeek said…
Been there. Done that. Didn't work.
So sorry to be the one to break this to you, but even declaring myself a spinster and learning that being alone doesn't mean being less than others didn't seem to kill the eternal hope that seemed to keep springing. Which is, of course, why I turned to the devil's vice of on-line dating (aka my road to the nuthouse).
At 10:02 pm,
Anonymous said…
I'd need all the luck in the world and then some! I can't charm the ladeez like yourself & hate rejection so I've decided to give up and dedicate my life to music and alcohol instead.
Only problem is it's now spring & the sap's rising. No matter how much women can & often do f*ck up your life you still want to go back for more *GRRR* LOL!
PS where's my CD (you know the one *wink* )
At 11:08 pm,
HistoryGeek said…
Now, now, let's be fair...women may f up the lives of men, but the reverse is also true (not to mention the fine men and women who f up the lives of people of their own genders).
AND what AJ said...are you okay, Flash?
At 11:40 pm,
Anonymous said…
He says:
we find a little room like a storage cupboard or something
He says:
then & this is not normal for me, we get straight into it
He says:
then 4 seconds later it's over!
She says:
get out
She says:
4 seconds
He Says:
shit, i meant hours
She says:
oh
She says:
good
ooooooo
At 4:10 am,
LavaLady said…
I don't know if I can ever manage a truly platonic relationship with a man - I suppose I can *think* anything I want, right?
But if I want to screw someone, is the relationship still platonic?
Personally I think you should give it another go, someday. Never is a mighty long time.
And now, I think I'll have a nice wank (as a woman, can I say that?). Because you can beat an egg...
At 9:05 am,
LB said…
this is a brave stance.
presumably sometime in the next, say, forty years you are going to get a bit tipsy in the company of a lady and ensuing fumblage will occur. Fact.
and you will also probably find that if you stop looking, it'll come and find you (although, granted, this isnt a strategy with which I am blessed with success).
At 1:32 pm,
Anonymous said…
most non platonic friends begin life as a platonice friend would you not say?
At 2:56 pm,
Hyde said…
I think that life will take you by surprise. I also think that if you spend your time on "rewarding activities" and self-development you will only become more and more attractive to the opposite sex. (So either way, it will work out!) Cheer up! :) Sending more hugs...
-hyde
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