"This must be the place I've waited years to leave"

Part four: Baseball or Breasts? Doh!

So our adventure began in Toledo. One of the ladies at the plant had booked us tickets for the baseball game between Toledo Mudhens & Scranton Red Sox (I think!). This was cool & both Mr.Dull & I were really looking forward to it.
Upon taking our seats it became clear that this was like coming to England & taking in a football match between Scunthorpe United & Kidderminster Harriers!
Anyway we watched with eager anticipation...
God, it was crap! Proper, proper shite! As bad as cricket.
In between the innings there was entertainment in the form of "The Blues brothers". They drove into the stadium in their trademark car & proceeded to perform their trademark song. Mr.Dull was most pleased.
"Do you think it's really them?" he enquired of me.
I didn't have the heart to tell him, though I did enjoy telling everyone back home about it, complete with photo of the chump patiently queuing to get their autographs.

When we walked in to the stadium we bought two numbered tennis balls each, the idea being that at the end of the game everyone "pitched" their ball onto the grass & whoever got closest to a pre-determined point won $100. Whoo chuffing hoo.

Now I never knew that baseball took so bloody long & I was starting to worry about the next stage of the plan. The idea was that after the baseball we would drive up into Michigan, through Detroit & across into Canada. We had been reliably informed by Cool Big Guy & several others that Windsor was the place to go & we would be falling over ourselves at the choice of strip clubs! Nice.
So the baseball was dragging on & on & on, ad infinitum.
I said to Mr.Dull that we should head off if we want to get to the land of naked ladies.
"But I want to throw my ball at the end!"
"What????"
"I paid a dollar for that ball & I want to stay & throw it"
"Why don't you throw it now? It might liven the place up"

So we waited, Mr.Dull & I threw our balls onto the pitch with very different levels of enthusiasm but with equal amounts of success.
We left the ground at almost 10pm. I was not happy & I knew that we hadn't eaten yet. So that's what we did next. McDonald's if I recall.

After our feed it was almost 11 & Detroit was a good hour away. So with heavy heart I had to concede defeat & we got ourselves rooms in a motel some 30 odd miles from Detroit.

Lesson learned (wink to Cheryl) ... Do not go to watch the most boring sport ever with the most boring man ever when there are tits 'n' ass on the menu elsewhere.

To be continued...