"Embrasse moi, mets ton doigt dan mon cul"

Bon jour.

It's sunday afternoon here in Lyon & I have a rare few hours spare. So I'm back at the old internet place near the old hotel after having a frankly marvellous full english breakfast.

Today is the day for us to take a look back at 2005 in World of Flash.

January
The year got off to a bloody dreadful start when I was messed about by a Bitch just minutes into the new year. A day later everything was funky as I completed "Egg wielding freak".
Reading back over t'blog it would seem that little of any consequence happened in January bar working on the album & having a crapish birthday. That said I think I did some of my best blogging, telling the tales of Minx, Carrie & my American adventure. Anyone with lot's of time on their hands could do worse than giving them a read.

February
It was all a bit dull & frustrating in February. The vocals on the album weren't going very well & I was suffering from loneliness which was made worse by the massive phone bill that led to the severance of my internet connection.
On a happier note The Early Birds were born at the start of the month & though it was touch & go for a while they pulled through & are now perfectly fit & healthy. I also had a rare trip to Elland road where the mighty Leeds crushed Reading.
In blog land we played the very first game of Ask Flash, which was nice.

March
The third month was totally dominated by the release of "Confessions of an idiot" (which somewhat bizarrely seems to have been overlooked for the Brit awards!). The only other noteworthy stuff was the flirting with the girls at work, but it would surely all come to nothing right?

April
At the start of the month I finally, after 35 years, found out some details about my biological parents. It was a completley overwhelming experience that I've still not really come to terms with. I know I should pursue this further but something seems to be holding me back, fear perhaps.
I also had a cracking weekend where an old friend & I got it going on a little & I went paintballing for the first time.
I also trod on a frog.
The blog was still full of "Confessions..." type stuff but also a run through all my female colleagues & a competition which led to my I-pod being known as Humbert.

May
I think I was pretty despondant for the most part of May.
The undoubted highlight of the month was my Saturday night in London with the lovely Charby, The first blogger I got to meet in the flesh. I also very much enjoyed "Revenge of the sith" several times. At the end of the month I did two things of note; I "released" the rather magnificient "White celebration" & I gave up on women. No, really I did!

June
Literally days after giving up women I had a bit of result with HotLegs whilst on a trip oop north; If only I was staying in a hotel (sigh). Also there was "evidence to suggest that Nice has a serious crush on me". In other news I had a second meeting with a blogger when I went to visit Lordy B; Bloody nice fella. I decided to write a book. I revealed myself to the world in World of Flash- The Pictorial. "White celebration" was very well recieved. And there was the wonderful Key incident with Temper Tantrum.

July
I got laid! La la la!

Also; I met my 3rd real life blogger as a trip to see Coldplay gave me the opportunity to meet Swiss Toni, another fine fella. I got (far too) excited at the very real prospect of singing on live television to an audience of millions & got very distressed when it didn't come off. My little boy turned 6. Sadly, my very good friend Funny Dance & his family relocated to distant Somerset.
In blogland I waxed on about my enduring love for Depeche Mode, had a bit of a blog row going on over the Duke of Jokes birthday & dished up a mammoth post to celebrate a year's worth of blogging which was met by 35 comments; still a World of Flash record.

August
Ah good old August, the footy came back, The annual piss up occurred (though this year it was Brighton baby!), I had the thrill of doing a bungee jump & I had lots & lots of sex. Hurrah!

September
Another month, another blogger meeting. This time I had the pleasure of meeting the very lovely Scully. It was only 2 or 3 hours but it was great. I had a smashing day at the races where Joey Tribianni won me 36 quid - How you doin'? I had an ace night with Reckless, Dream Girl & some acid. The Boy & I had a little mini-holiday in Bournemouth. On the blog I began to question the essence of being Flash, I gave my fine readers thier own World of Flash type names & I failed to keep up with a flurry of memes that were flying about, well I was having a lot of sex y'know!

October
I went to visit FunnyDance down in Somerset with The Boy, went to Brum to see the Kaisers & the excellent Maximo Park, did little else except have lots of... oh you know by now, right?
In Blog terms I lost my mojo & banged on about Star Trek complete with pictures of the alpha quadrant's finest fillies!

November
In a effort to rediscover my blogging mojo I started the month with a new streamlined look (I sometimes miss the old green thing!). I also went up to Nottingham to go see the Bluetones with Lordy B & ST, I told the story of the Blackpool minger, then on the 15th life took a very unexpected turn as I was asked to go & work in Lyon, France!
Then I went to Lyon & it was ace! I went to see Coldplay too & my blog went from strength to strength! c'est bon!

December
Wonderful!
Lyon!
Fete du lumiares!
Nice in Lyon for the weekend!
Doing well at work!
A great xmas & a blissful year's eve!

So it really has been a year where each month has been better than the last.
2005 - I salute you.