"I've come to wish you an unhappy birthday"

Other than suffering some genuine tragedy I cannot imagine having a worse birthday. The only prezzie I received (for now) was some socks from Buddy With Boobs (bless her), though that’s not what made it bad.
There was a bit of a blizzard at about 3.30ish, it was very heavy snow that settled quickly but it had stopped within an hour. So at just after 4.30 I got in the car & headed off to Crapsville to spend some quality birthday time with The Boy prior to starting work at 8pm. So I got in the car at 4.30 & didn’t get to Crapsville until 20 past midnight! Nearly 8 fucking hours to do a trip that usually takes 25 minutes. 8 hours of stop-start-stop again traffic. The icing on the cake of all this? No fags! NO FUCKING FAGS!! Then when I finally had Crapsville in sight about a mile away…I ran out of petrol. Ace. So I never got to see The Boy, which has really upset me (& him), I’ve lost 4 hours overtime which I’d already put in & now I’ve got 5 hours work to do when I feel like I’ve already done a day’s work.
Throughout this ordeal Funny Dance has been an absolute diamond (again!), he phoned me early on into my journey to warn me how bad the roads were. It took him 3 hours to get home. After he got in he phoned me about every half hour to make sure I was ok. Then when I finally arrived he’d made me up some sandwiches, got me some fags & gave me some change for coffees. He also notified work for me, as I had no credit. I shall make a big effort to show him how much I appreciate all his help. Maybe a really lavish birthday present for Funny Dance this year.