"A year went by in the blink of an eye"

This post was supposed to be publish on Friday 29th July. I started it back on Tuesday but as you know I've been a little *ahem* distracted. I also really didn't realise how long it would take. I've been on it for 3 hours just today. It's probably not as in-depth as it should've been as, frankly, I got fed up with it! I almost scrapped the whole bloody thing last night!
Anyway, be warned - you may require a potty break!


A year ago today my life changed.
I didn't actually notice anything of any life changing proportions happen, but change it did.
My life started on a different part the very second that I did this:

Thursday, July 29, 2004

Well that was bloody easy!!
In fact it was so simple that now I sit a little perplexed. I assumed (a recurring failing) that it would take hours to get sorted & I could use that time to come up with some dazzlingly witty & clever opening post that would instantly show me to be a total "geezer".
Sadly, I now feel a bit silly.
Welcome to my world.

posted by Flash
---------------------------------------
Yup, that was my very first post on this blog. Everything that exists in World of Flash prior to that post had been written in a paper journal, which I later typed up & posted.

It's been a hell of a year. So, join me as we look back over my first year of being that most special of beasts; The Blogger.

Part one: The statistics

There have been (not including this one) 223 posts.
There have been 937 comments by 54 different people (multiple identities only counting as 1).

Part two: The titles

Here is a breakdown of who is responsible for all the lyrics I call upon for titling my 223 posts.
I'm sure the foremost act won't come as a surprise.
22 (posts) - Depeche Mode
6- The Smiths, The Divine Comedy, Nik Kershaw, Snow patrol, The White stripes
5- Radiohead, Easyworld, Adam & the ants/Adam Ant, Coldplay, Gnu Cnu
4- The Bluetones, James, Stereophonics, Morrissey, Pet shop boys, Nine inch nails
3- Duran duran, Oasis, Del amitri, Muse, Travis, REM, The Supernaturals, Kaiser Chiefs
2- Kylie Minogue, The Dandys, Mansun, Thompson twins, The Killers, The streets, Embrace, Men at work, U2, Leeds united FC, Feeder, Clearlake, Tears for fears, Pulp, New order, The Beatles, Catatonia, Marillion
1- Bronski beat, Alanis Morissette, ABC, Dead or alive, Irrelevance, Eels, Placebo, Talk talk, Dream academy, The the, Dave Gahan, A-ha, Elvis Costello, Madonna, Bon Jovi, Prince, Supergrass, The Housemartins, Hue & Cry, Mariah Carey (!!!), Nitzer ebb, Deniece Williams (!!), Nelly, Super furry animals, Louis Armstrong, Happy Mondays, Simple Minds, Robbie Williams, The Prodigy, Echo & the bunnymen, Starsailor, David Bowie, Carrie, Frankie goes to Hollywood, Meatloaf (!), Suede, Athlete, Blur, The Music, Electric 6, Stone roses, Manic street preachers, Abba, Motorhead, Shed seven, The Beloved, The Beautiful south, JJ72, Howard Jones, Bright eyes, Spandau ballet, The Bravery, Keane, British sea power, Stephen "tin tin" Duffy & The Pointer Sisters (!!).
There were also 3 used from origins unknown.

Part three: The Commenters.

My first comment came on only my second post. To be honest, I hadn't really grasped the beauty of the comments section. I sure have now but more of that later.
On the 25th of August the one who would turn out to be the first of my commenters arrived. Who was that then, eh? A young man of immense talent that will surely pave the way to a very bright future. The Mothslayer supreme. The Stomppmeister!
Stompp, a fellow Brit, & I talked about the weather!
Though he returned several times, he then disappeared from my comments for ages before blazing back in at Xmas & staying for good.
A favourite* comment from Stompp will always be:
""FUCK CUNTYBOLLOCKS SHIT TRAMPWANK." lovingly created for you by Flash

"Yeah I can feel the loving creation hahah! :D"

* I don't feel capable of picking out an actual fave comment from everyone, but they'll be ones I do really like.

A week or so later, there was Cheryl. She of the many names would go on to be an absolute shining star in my life. She became devoted to this blog, as I did to hers. She became my friend off the blog (Ah, that first IM) & one day in the not too distant future, I promise I will go to her land & thank her in person for all she has given me. It'll be one hell of a thankyou! I could devote this whole post to her, but in the interests of balance I shall have to leave it there. Except to relive some of her comments:
"...and Purple ROCKS! That's why it is my favorite color.
Oooooh, I bet that irked you. I ruined 2 English words back to back. : )~"

"Great! Apparently you have a song. I was at lunch today and they have an all request line and someone called in and requested... PURPLE RAIN!
Now, normally I would flip that song off the radio, but not this time, I sang along all in honoUr of my dear friend across the Atlantic. Flash!!!!
I do believe that every time I hear that song now, it will remind me of you and a certain blog entry that made you roar for sometime. We really have had some good times, considering I never actually met you."

"Flash,
As your # 1 Fan....I will never leave you.
As your loyal commentor....I will never leave you.
As your friend... I will never leave you.
As your Far Flung Friend... I will never leave you.

I thank you for bending the lyric title rule for me. As a man who went through what I am going through, I know you respect my decision. Your lack of communication with me is nothing you should apologize for. You have a life... I do not.I will continue to read about your life....and I will continue to comment as I see fit.
I will continue to cling to the hope that one day you and I will share those 4 seconds in the airport you spoke of all those months ago :
PS our secret is out....I gave up my identity, sorry if it has ruined it for you. And your other readers.

I need you like the earth needs the sun.
Always,
~ C ~
ooo "

A mere 6 days later I had "my girls". Young Charby hopped on board via the sex whilst eating a bacon sarnie & watching football post. "It would sure brighten up your average Charlton game" she chirped. Not wrong there missy!
Charby has always been capable of giving me a big warm cyberhug as much as she has of having a playful pop at me. Charby also became the first blogger I met in the flesh. We had a great time & I loved her as much in person as I always have in type. A favourite example from sarf London's tidy-arsed graduate who brought you the word "Trampwank", after she went AWOL for a few days & I panicked:
"I'm still popping by every day to get my daily dose of Flash!"

Next up, after a tip off, The Duke of Jokes turned up. The DOJ & I have been friends since we were 11. We grew up together & had so many laughs during that time. I don't remember ever falling out with him either. We did drift apart for about 14 years but now were just the good old mates we always were. I always wanna hang with him when I go up north & if this too much of a *eyes roll* "soft get" thing to say, having the guy round the blog means he's always around despite the 120 mile distance. And frankly that rocks!
The man once known as Dukestral manoevres in the Joke is unique round here in that he isn't a blogger. About time that changed mateyboy! Then I could try & leave comments like this:
"Who the heck are Easyworld?
Are they as good as the 80's group Irrelevance? ;)

"Quite Remarkable" "

Also I have a big soft spot for this bit of sparring:
At 11:22 PM, Charby said...
Leeds...*snigger*

At 11:56 PM, The Duke of Jokes said...
Leeds...*snigger*OI!
Let's compare honours.....
Leeds United
League Champions 1968-69, 1973-74, 1991-92
Runners-Up 1964-65, 1965-66, 1969-70, 1970-71, 1971-72
Division Two Champions 1923-24, 1963-64, 1989-90
Division Two Runners-Up 1927-28, 1931-32, 1955-56
FA Cup Winners 1972
FA Cup Finalists 1965, 1970, 1973
League Cup Winners 1968
League Cup Finalists 1996
European Cup Finalists 1975 (Robbed by bent Ref)
European Cup Winners Cup Finalists 1973 (Ditto)
Fairs Cup Winners 1968, 1971
Fairs Cup Finalists 1967
FA Charity Shield Winners 1969, 1992
FA Youth Challenge Cup Winners 1993, 1997

Charlton Athletic
Division 1 Champions 1999-00
Runners-Up 1935-36
Play-off Champions 1986-87, 1997-98
Division 2 Runners-Up 1935-36, 1985-86
Division 3 (South) Champions 1928-29, 1934-35
Promoted 1974-75, 1980-81
Runners-Up 1935-36
FA Cup Winners 1947
Runners-Up 1946

Hmmmm ;-)

At 10:09 PM, Charby said...
Hehe.If we're gonna be petty...Who's in the premiership now huh?
lol

And it remained liked that for quite a while; just the four of us.
Mid-November game the threat of a "trans-atlantic slap round the chops" from the enigma that is Gladys Cortez. Gladys makes me laugh & Gladys makes sense. I feel her to be something of a kindred spirit in many ways, sometimes to such an extent that I wonder if we weren't separated at birth! And the Snoop Dogg-ifier she recommended made me piss my pants.
Something from my my Chicago dwelling friend after my heroic key rescuing escapade:
"Oh, so VERY kick-ass.
And you SOOOO earned the right to be smug. In fact--to me, it sounds like you had QUITE a bit more smug-time available to you before your Fifteen Minutes of Smug went "ding".
Way to go, MacGyver!"

A week later young Chapstick popped by. The wide eyed Luke Skywalker to my often world-weary Han Solo, eh kid? Like Stompp, I reckon there's a bright future ahead for my young friend & also like Stompp he seems to have been on a comment embargo. Glad to see you back mate, place ain't the same without you checking in!
Some words from Chapstick that moved me to much laughter, in response to some colloquial (SP?) footy speak: "I am 90% sure I have not a clue what the Duke just said..."

Then for my birthday I got Hyde! God bless her! Always making me smile with her LOL's & often extending a hug. Hyde & her life fascinate me. It all seems so far away from my life. New York city obviously lends itself to fuller existence than is possible in Crapsville but Hyde's capacity for love & for enjoying life would shine anywhere. Hyde, you rock baby! And I await that "Swedish hug" you once offered me (even though I can only guess as to what that actually involves!).
And this is just one of my favourites comments ever;
"A drunk, stoned and happy Flash who got some time with his drunk Dream Girl.

I love it.
:) "

February 7th - Here's Ka! Out of nowhere she flew in during the first bout of Ask Flash. Ka has another life that fascinates me. She's funny & clever & adventurous. And since her recent trip to Brazil (booked on a whim - fantastic!) prompted her to share photos, she's revealed herself to be what us Yorkshire folk would call "a reet bonny lass" or, to put it another way, a babe.
Another blogger warned me off her, claiming her to be his! I told him: pistols at dawn!
And this made me howl, following up some regional dialect flavoured stuff with:
"Maple syrup toque kayak! Sleddog sidewalk Double Double.

Man, I have such a boring country. "

I also loved her answers to the "Look I'm getting totally up my own arse now so let's talk about me" quiz thing I did.


One of the things I love about blogging is that it gives me the opportunity to perform a bit. This is a truly good thing for me. Stretching the performance thing out, I feel that in mid-March I took a step up in terms of audience. Like going from the tiny stage in the backroom of a pub, to proper little venues. Or winning promotion from the conference to league 2. The first sign of this "growth" was when, within minutes of each other Mark & Lord Bargain commented.

It would appear that other than Del Amitri I had stolen Mark's entire record collection! A man of fine musical taste, Mark has pointed me in the direction of some cool downloads & I like his (often scathing) reviews. I have for some time wondered whether I dare ask for one of "Confessions of an idiot". It's fair to say that our man in London & I have differing outlooks on life & I often find myself disagreeing with him. That said though I do have an unwavering respect for the guy & look forward to meeting him in person (maybe Wembley Arena for DM).
Mark making perfect sense:
""the fairer sex"? women are never fair, only RIGHT. "

Lordy B (as I somehow cannot help calling him) liked the sound of "Egg wielding freak". Really? Come in mate, have a look around!
I've since had the good fortune to meet the mullet-shunning big fella a couple of times. Simply, the bloke's a legend. Already I consider him to be a dear friend & he's quite possibly the nicest man in the world. I have so much in common with him that it's scary. He's a funny chap too & his I-pod also has a fantastic sense of humour (arf!)! I'm sure there are many real life adventures with Lordy B to come in the future.
Lordy B in the house after our trip to see Coldplay in Bolton (I had to choose this one 'cos I can't believe i forgot to mention it):
"what this young man also fails to mention is that about halfway through the Coldplay set, he is merrily singing along when the guy in front turns round and says" you're bloody brilliant mate, you should be up there on the stage with them."

though why I should be gracious after your diatribe on my lovely pop records, heaven only knows.

not the best journey, then. yikes. I have never seen the guys in "London's Burning" ever put out a flaming engine fire with Diet Coke either, by the way...Anyway, glad you enjoyed the show, pixie. heh heh heh "

Another chap who the term "a gentleman & a scholar" wouldn't be out of place on & who is (in my view anyway) intrisically linked with Mr. Bargain is our Lycra clad giant; Swiss Toni. A giant not just in terms of stature either, In my opinion he's the daddy of the blog circle I dwell in. I had the pleasure of meeting ST recently & he's another smashing bloke. Thoroughly likeable chap with top notch taste in tunes & blogs. After only his second comment, I knew then I had another new friend.
That comment from Swiss Toni that really did mean the world to me:
" Flash - I just did something I have never done before, and I wanted to share it with you: I have read your blog from bottom to top. Maybe not every word, but most of 'em. I have this thing where I like to have a look at people's first ever post, and was grabbed by yours straight away (which all made sense as I read on and realised that it had originally come from an actual paper journal) so I just kept on reading.

Good stuff - thanks for stopping round mine and revealing your existence to me!(Oh, and don't bother looking at my first post either - one of the reasons I look at other people's is because mine is so shite.)

Just wanted to share...
ST "

Then who should stroll in? Only my childhood hero!! Only ADAMANT!!!!! Since jacking in all that music biz stuff he's settled in Texas, doesn't seem quite as loopy & dispenses fantastic stories to the world. He's also dispensed fantastic comments & advice my way. Joking aside, our Blogging Mr. Ant is more of a legend than his namesake. I think very highly of him & I'm very glad he came round here. It's a better place since his arrival. Big respect, dude.
I liked this one:
" When I arrived in the States I made a few mistakes. It took me a while before I realised 'going outside to smoke a fag' indicated to my American colleagues that I was going outside to kill a homosexual. "

A couple of posts later, Dzesika revealed herself (not like that (not that I'd object!)). An American living just down the road, she offers a different perspective on life in the UK. She also appears to be a lady of fine taste & with a zest for life that I find refreshing. She found a permanent place in my heart after stating that, musically, I rock! I hope I'm not overstepping the mark but I'm sure at some point we will have a meet up (though not for the proms, eh?) as she's only an hour away. I have to confess that it took me far too long to realise that her name is pronounced Jessica. Doh!
"I say we get Nice Not Hot and the International Playboy in a room together, and scold them for not leaving their significant others and moving on to us, because we are both so obviously more interesting/witty/sexy/etc.
Do I have a plan here? "
I'm doing my bit Jess, you?


World of Flash's door swung open next to welcome in Spins. Spinsterwitch has fast become one of my most prolific commenters. I could go on & on about how her presence comforts me or how chuffed I was to receive mail about my tunes from her or how I have an extra reason for visiting San Francisco (which is on my travel wish list) but I'm not going to. I'm just going to say Spins is purely & simply; Lovely.
Again after the Key thing:
"Dang, Flash, you've earned yourself in that post references to Indiana Jones, MacGyver & the A-Team!
You are undoubtedly our blog action hero."

My first post of May saw Lava Lady's arrival. Quickly establishing herself as a member of this strange posse, Lava Lady is a very similar position in her life to where I am. I like the way that she sometimes e-mails me in response to comments I leave at her place & I like the way she (again, like me) wears her heart proudly on her sleeve. I'm still getting to know her, but I've heard her voice & seen her face. I look forward to getting to know her better.
(Should I confess that on my first visit to her blog, I saw a photo that made me say out loud "Nice chest!" ? No? Ok, I'll keep that to myself then.)
Lava Lady at Revenge of the sith time:
"My friends and I used to take turns being Princess Leia."
In my finest Joey style; Yeah, baby!

Mr Mystic came in next. Somewhat enigmatic & with a knack for commenting on parts of a post that no one else has (which I do like, by the way) Mystic is again someone I'm still getting to know. Part of this process is going to involve writing a song together which I'm very excited about. I'll sort some lyrics soon for him, promise. It should be known that his mystical abilities have revealed that I absolutely will get some recognition for my musical efforts. Top Man.
Sometimes I feel vindicated when getting praise for silly things:
"Getting drunk a couple of nights ago now getting high. atta boy flash."

As I proclaimed to have given up with women (did well, eh?) AJ came by for the first time & wished me luck.
AJ is quite mad. AJ is funny. AJ has threatened me with torture and violence. Did I mention that she's mad?
AJ has swiftly become a highly valued member of this community & I'm bloody glad about that.
On hearing "White Celebration", AJ offered an interesting interpretation that warrants a repeat viewing but I really liked this one after the pictorial :
"You're adorable! (in a, "he followed me home can I keep him if he doesn't shit on the rug" sort of way) "

Which of course is totally spot on.

Whilst the heat was stifling on June 20th along came Scully. I feel that Scully & I have very quickly formed a special bond. We have the common ground of adoption on which we can help each other out. It's only been just over a month so we're still new friends, but that is what we are; friends.
She is clearly very perceptive too, see:
"You have extremely good taste in music."

The same day Lori~Flower came by & a couple of days later Adem called in. At this point I may be getting a bit presumptuous about someone being a "regular" commenter & I can't offer too much in terms of who they are, but both have been by a few times & have made me laugh. That's always a good thing. I do also have to give a shout out to Brock who drops in now & again with the odd nugget of his wisdom. To Silly Boy, whose few comments have been, erm, invaluable. And to all those people who've maybe only commented once or twice. I hope they all continue to come by. Despite this post's praise of all my existing friends, World of Flash is a place that is always open & absolutely everybody is welcome.

Group hug?

What I didn't realise a year ago was how comments are the food that bloggers need to survive. I really do cherish you all & it's because of your input that World of Flash continues to prosper.
Anyway that's enough for the lovefest.

Part 4: Me

I feel like a much better person since I became a blogger. The effects that blogging has had on my life are immeasurable.
I am much more confident in myself then I have been in years.
I really enjoy writing & I feel I've become a much better writer. I'm quite proud of some of my stories & musings.
I have so many new friends, which really is the bestest, bestest thing; It makes me giddy.
I am seldom bored these days.
I have found a small audience for my music which is so utterly fantastic that it gives me a hard on.
And finally, and I hope you get this & don't think I'm an arsehole, I feel like a kind of mini-celebrity & I'm sure you can all imagine how much that floats my boat.
The only tiny little cloud in the big blue sky is that because of my obsessional nature I have found that sometimes I've neglected my "real" life for all this. I must keep an eye on that.

Part 5: My favourite posts

Trying to do is is just too difficult so I'm just gonna choose one. The first time where I actually told a story stands out to me. It may not be my actual favourite but it's very special to me & I like it a lot.
It's called "Oh father" & if you've not read it before, please take a look.
I also thought the 7 part epic retelling of my American adventure was pretty cool (you can find that back in January)

Part 6: Summary

This post has took literally days to compile & write. It may have took as long to read too, for which I can only apologise.
I'm glad I have though, you guys know that I like to anniversary-ise everything, I couldn't let it pass.
I LOVE BLOGGING & I THINK BLOGGING LOVES ME. That's the bottom line.

"Oh my god, I can't believe it!"

I know I promised a big post today but it's taking much longer than I anticipated. It's on it's way, I promise. It may have to be tomorrow.
I'm sure there was something else...

erm..

hang on...

Oh yeah, that's it. I spent the afternoon having some of the most breathtaking, earthmoving, head exploding, simply fucking fantastic sex that I've had for a very long time.

"It was only a kiss, it was only a kiss"

Explanation then, eh?

Monday was Nice's birthday & she had the day off work.
Tuesday I had a day's holiday.
Wednesday then was the first time we'd really seen each other for a couple of weeks as I'd been on lates. Wednesday was also a very quiet day for me in terms of what work I had to do so I hung out in the area that Nice works in, a lot. We had a lot of banter throughout the day & I teased her that I still owed her a birthday kiss. Later in the day we had quite the little talk. Turns out all is not well with her relationship & she wants out. Also that she had a crush on somebody & hoped something might happen with them. I pretended that I didn't know that the crush was me & asked if she thought her crush felt the same way. She thought so.
Now, 2 or 3 weeks ago she expressed a desire to come round & have a browse through all my old vinyl, being a bit of a collector. She called round when I was out.
It was suggested that she popped in on Wednesday after work. All my records are in my bedroom & it made sense to look at them there, especially as The Boy was in the living room playing on his gamecube. When the records where done with I said that "perhaps now would be an appropriate time & place for that birthday kiss?" She agreed. And so we kissed. A lot. It was wonderful. It was also quite passionate & things may have gotten a bit more steamy were it not for The Boy's presence down the hall.

Today at work we exchanged many a knowing glance during our many meetings in the smoking area with Lil' One & Lil' Mum. We also managed to sneak in a little kiss when no one was around.

I am excited & concerned in equal measure.
There's no two ways about it, Nice is a lovely girl. And I'm looking forward to seeing where this story will lead.
I am also scared, I'm not sure I like the idea of her leaving her boyfriend for me. I don't even think that I'm ready for anything big. Hopefully, we'll soon get the chance to talk about these sort of things.

I'd also like to point out that, though I knew she liked me, I thought that Nice & her boyfriend were cool so I never anticipated this. Even when I changed her blog name. I do understand how one could draw such a conclusion though.

My emotions are actually all over the shop. I've just 10 minutes ago waved goodbye to my son who is now on his way to granny's in Watford. Tomorrow morning he flies out to Menorca for a week, I'll miss him big style. That said, I will enjoy the lack of strict routine for a week.

And of course, Funny Dance's departure is now only a day away.

But a girl likes me! La la la!

"Kiss me with your mouth"

Sometimes I think I give too much detail.
Today I'm not going to do that.
Nice & I enjoyed some serious snogging today.

"I'm going out for a while so I can get high with my friends"

So, Saturday night was actually quite fun & I feel guilty for presenting it a way that belied that fact.
I just got a bit pissed off at the undying quirk of fate that keeps taunting me - All women that find me attractive are either already attached or on another continent.
Honestly, I can state without fear of correction that I know of at least 4 women round these parts who've got the hots for me & all of them are already in relationships. I'm afraid my drunkenness was responsible for my moaning (thanks for the comfort by the way).
My drunkenness was also responsible for (& you may want to cover your eyes here) the sight of naked Flash on his hands & knees cleaning up all of the recently ejected vomit from my bathroom floor at 4am. At the same time I discovered that my houseguest had shit in the bath.
Yes, she may be all nice for a bit of a cuddle but leaving a plop in my bathtub is not acceptable. Especially not while she has a perfectly nice litter tray not 3 bloody feet away.
Bloody Purdy!

Purdy is the lead feline member of the Reckless & Dream Girl family. They are now in Cornwall on a weeks family holiday.

Sunday was a busy day. After a mercifully long lie in, Our Kid & SportyBruv came down from Yorkshire for a visit. They couldn't make it for The Boy's birthday last weekend but they had prezzies for him so they made the trip. It was nice to see them, we went out for a nice pub lunch & just hung out in the flat. Sunday's torrential rain quite literally pissed all over our plans to spend a nice day out in Warwick.
Our Kid, bless her, has often visited me since I left home. She's the only one though.
In 17 years my parents have been to Crapsville 3 times. Any guesses as to the occasions?

My smashing sister left about teatime & I had an hour or two of chill time before the next phase of the day.
With Reckless & Dream Girl going off to Cornwall on Monday morning & Funny Dance moving to Somerset at the end of this week, it was agreed that we'd all hang out together on Sunday night. We played Mario Kart, smoked many a spliff & just enjoyed each other's company. It was a bit emotional for the rest of them but my goodbyes don't come this the weekend. I'm dreading it.

Tonight, I will accompany Funny Dance to the pub, where a few of his friends are gonna give him a bit of a send off.

I may devote a post to the whole Funny Dance leaving drama over the next few days. I'm also thinking that when he goes I should let him know of World of Flash so he can keep up with my life. I know I've never said a bad word about him on here & I think he suspects the depth of feelings for Dream Girl, so what's to lose? What do you fine people think?

Anyway, I have a 6 year old boy who I have to surgically remove from his gamecube so we can go to the park. I may not be around much this week for I have a grand project to undertake. I WILL be posting on Friday, look out for it.
Adios amigos.

"Don't laugh at me"

Forgibe spelling & grammer for I am quite drunk.

I've been to a wedding reception tonight.
At one point this quite attractive long blonde haired woman starts dancing with me.
Sweet.
She's giving me the moves & we actually kiss, albeit briefly.
Then 2 women I know come & drag me away sharpish.
Turns out that boyfriend has been watchiong the whole time.
Fiar enough, but any ideas why a woman would do that?

I quite simply don;t deserve or need that kinda shit.

"Ask me your questions, I'll tell you no lies"

Here goes then:

"Anonymous" asked:
Fav Food?
Fav Card Game?
Fav Board Game?
If you can remember...fav sexual position?

Proper Yorkshire Fish & chips would be my number 1 food, followed by a self-made sausage & egg sandwich (with perhaps a cheese slice melted between the sausages & the egg) & a KFC variety meal. Oh bugger I suddenly feel very hungry indeed!

I'm not really au fait with many card games but I used to enjoy a game called Newmarket that I now don't remember how to play, other than that; Take 2.

Monopoly, it's the only time you'll see the lesser spotted Flash ruthless streak.

Cheeky sod! I enjoy a variety of positions but my favourite is always to have my lover on top. I like to be able to see. It's nothing to do with laziness, I assure you.
But I suspect that you already knew that.

The Duke Of Jokes asked:
Alright then>New DM single-to-be "Precious" whatcha reckon?

So far I've listened to it 3 times. I haven't put it on Humbert yet cos there was a power cut in Crapsville this morning. However my early thoughts are thus: I like how soft it is, I think it's probably a grower as it hasn't it like any of the lead singles off the last few albums. I also agree that Dave's voice sounds really good. Bottom line is I'm quietly impressed.

Dzesika asked:
Who would play you in the movie of your life?

Mmm, tricky one. Brad Pitt? No? Ok.
I've found that over the last year or two I've been massively impressed with Johnny Depp, so he would be ideal, however I don't think I qualify for him. So then I thought a ten years younger Bruce Willis, after all I am an action hero right? No?
Ricky Gervais then. Sorted.

Lordy B asked:
hmmm.
I have been meaning to ask you how you coped with the Boy going to live with his mum and stuff, but the comments section of your blog might not be the best place for a response.
what about the story of your first snog?

Believe me my first snog was a ghastly experience so I'm much happier to talk about The Boy.

Leaving my son, was without question the most difficult thing I've ever done. I cried on the day I left but not one of those tears was for Temper Tantrum. I do feel quite proud of myself though because I really do feel that our relationship has never suffered. I have for the 3 years since I left, spent as much if not more quality time with him than I did when I lived with his mum. Even for the best part of 2 years when I lived 16 miles away from him I would see him almost every day. I would finish work & then go & hang out with him, not getting home til 7ish most nights. He also doesn't have to witness the sniping & the arguing. There have been things that I've missed but on the whole I am entirely happy with the way things are. Even the selfish part of me gets a good deal because I still possess some degree of freedom when I don't see him.

Ka asked: (though I don't think it was actually intended for Ask Flash, but what the hell!)
What did I miss? Had a rough week, did you, mate?

You missed my "Irate meltdown" & no, just a bad day.

Lori~Flower asked:
Most embarrassing moment ?

Oddly, I couldn't think of many. The most embarrassing moment in recent times came when I was living with my friends Reckless & Dream Girl. They had a 3 storey house & my room was on the ground floor next to the front door.
One Sunday morning I'm happily snoozing away when I hear a woman's voice calling Hello. After coming round I realise that it's coming from the hallway & that it belongs to TemperMental, Reckless' ex-wife (we don't half pick 'em!). She had come to bring something for their son who had slept over. She's still calling Hello & nobody upstairs is hearing her so I gingerly get out of bed & carefully position myself so that I can stand in my doorway & poke my head round the door. She would be at the front door & would have only a clear view of my head & not of my naked body.
I was a little puzzled when I couldn't see her at the door. Then I heard "Ooh, Hello Flash".
Allow me to illustrate:





















So there stands TemperMental looking me up & down (mostly down) "Looking good there, Flash" she teases, I hastily cover my modesty. Though I was stricken with embarrassment, luckily for me I was at that period of my life as slim as I'd ever, ever been. And it at least evened up the score after her unfeasibly large "funbags" had fallen out right in front of my face on the very first time I met her, some 8 or 9 years previous.

*Unlike my current one, that bed could tell you some stories!

Stompp asked:
If you could go back in time and take an album from the future with you to release under your own name (wrong and dastardly, but hey if I could travel through time I know I'd do it) and thus gain millions from it, which album would you take?

Believe it or not, but I've actually thought about this many times in the past. And I'm still no closer to a definitive answer. Having given it a lot of thought of the last 24 hours I think I'd have to go for "Definitely maybe". What a wonderous career that would open, eh? And I reckon I could follow it up too. That said, I would much rather go back 12 years with "Confessions of an idiot" tucked under my arm & take my chances with that.

Charby asked:
Place/thing you'd most like to see/do before you become too old and crinkly to enjoy?

(Yes FFF, that would be on the list!)

As I will be going to New York long before any crinkliness I shall not worry about that right now.
I would like to travel to Australia, Sweden & Egypt. In an ideal world, I would take my Dad to Egypt & we'd do all the obvious things. As far back as I can remember it's the one place he's always wanted to go.
Other than that I'd like to (even if it's just one more time) see an audience from the stage I'm performing on.

Scully asked:
Fave tv show - ever!
Fave chocolate treat
Fave toy from childhood

Tv show is easy, as much as I used to adore The Young Ones & South Park, it's Friends. It's quite simply hilariously funny, even after repeat viewings. All the characters are wonderful too.
I think it may also be the syncronicity involved for me personally. I am the exact same age as those guys & throughout the 10 series there was a lot of "Oh, I can so totally relate to that" moments. It's also really clever that between the 6 of them they account for almost all the character traits one could have, making it so easy to associate with them. I love those guys (especially Rachel).

Favourite Chocolate treat: At the moment I am addicted to Chocolate brownie vienetta, which is a big block of sumptuous choccy ice cream. I've got some in the freezer which I shall be having when I get home, assuming the power cut didn't last too long.

Favourite toy from childhood: My penis.

R asked:
Well, I don't pop my nose round the door for a couple of days and I find myself amongst brawling bloggers.Pretending it's your birthday to start a fight ?!?. Well you know you're not going to get girly hugs and sympathy from me you big fraud.
You see Flash, I can see what's happening. The famous Flash harem is teetering on the brink of collapse and you're not man enough to cope with the rejection.
Nero and Rome spring to mind.
Sunshine has all but stuck pins in the image she used to worship, Hyde is having more sex than is good for her, and Charby is trying to tell you in her own way that she now has a boyfriend of her own age and she only ever saw you as a father figure anyway.What do you say to that ?!.
Manly response please, no self pity and blubbing.

Right (rubs hands)
Firstly I believe The Duke Of Jokes has already more than adequately dealt with the charge of lying about my birthday.
Big Fraud?? Let me explain something to you R & I'll try not to use too many big words, ok?
It takes an almighty amount of bravery to bare one's soul to the whole world, as we in blogland do on a daily basis, it's an act of pure truth. It would be a totally pointless exercise to be dishonest. Almost as pointless as coming round my place while I've got a housefull & throwing down a gauntlet, such as you have. And for chuff's sake, could you have not done that on Tuesday when I was really in the mood for a ruck??
So to the "Harem". I do not & have not ever claimed to have a harem. I do have "my girls" however. This consists of Cheryl & Charby, I also consider Hyde an honorary member of this group. This "group" was not formed artificially or contrived. It came about from the early days of this blog when I only had 3 (then 4) regular commenters. Both Cheryl & Charby were (& I suspect still are) happy to be "my girls".
On the brink of collapse?
Only yesterday Cheryl said this:
"How could I NOT worship the original super hero of blogland?
Flash and I have had some very good times and had a lot of laughs and I by no means stuck pins in him at all.
We both were having bad days on the same day, which may have come across to all you other readers as tension.
He and I are as tight now as we ever were.
I'm not going anywhere, and I'm not intending on replacing Flash with you.
I doubt Charbs or Hyde had any intentions of leaving him for you either.
Though I know that was the plan.
Backfired.
Better luck next time. "

That's quite conclusive, eh R?

However I'm not done yet.
Far from my "harem" crumbling, it is actually ever-expanding.
I'm sure the ladies who come here won't mind being put into my "Harem" for the purpose of this exercise. They probably already know that I wouldn't normally use such a crass term or that I wouldn't lump them all in together, being that they are all very different individuals.
If you were to browse through some past comments, or be privy to my e-mail, you would discover that almost every woman who comes by here regualrly has at some point or other expressed thoughts of warmth, love & happiness in my direction.
And d'you know what?
It's not just the women.
And it's not just blog-people.
Do you know why this is?
It used to say at the top of the page in the "about me" bit: To know me is to love me.
Like I already established, there is no point in being dishonest.
That statement may come across as big-headed, even arrogant.
It is not though, it's an observation of an man old enough & comfortable enough with himself to know his own worth.

Hopefully, by now you will also have a better idea of your own worth.

Finally in the spirit of Nero & Rome, take a look around this colloseum. See all the thumbs being turned downwards? See the Lions?


AdamAnt asked:
Flash, here's a question: Who will be the coming season's top scorer in the Prem?

Mr.Ant, I cannot see anybody other than Thierry Henry claiming that honour again. Or maybe Franny Jeffers! (sniggers)
Rob Hulse in the championship, mark my words.

Lordy B (again!) asked:
because DOJ has mentioned his birthday again, does that mean I have to say "happy birthday, DOJ" otherwise Flash will go into irate meltdown again?

No.

Spinsperwitch asked:
Who would you have dinner with, living or dead? And what's the burning question you'd ask them?

I know I should probably come out with someone totally iconic here but, after much musing, I would have dinner with Kylie Minogue. After a couple of hours of charm my burning question would then be: Can we have sex now please?

Silly boy asked:
When will you be famous?

I can't answer, I can't answer that.


Now then peeps, that was fun, eh?
Here comes the twist, I'd like all of you now to answer the question you asked me yourself.
Will the first one in, please ask Lordy B a question cos his was quite specific to me. Ta.

"I'm the first to admit, if you catch me in a mood like this I can be tiring, even embarrassing"

I really don't know quite what was going on in my head yesterday.
How bizarre.
However, look at all those lovely comments! Perhaps I should do it more often!
Flash's Tuesday Tirade?
Midweek moaning from the Flashman?
What d'you think?
No, me neither.

There is something I feel I need to point out though. My birthday is in January.
It hasn't been my birthday but to all the people who wished me a happy one, I say cheers!

How embarrassing that I happen to get 3 new people commenting on a day like yesterday.
I hope they come back.

On checking my Soundclick stats for yesterday I found that the whole of "Confessions of an idiot" was downloaded & "White celebration" was downloaded 3 times. Yay!
Got me thinking though, I'm not sure "White celebration" should be at the top of the list. I don't think it's the song I want people to hear first.
buoyed by this, I actually properly started work on Album2* this morning. The first song is coming together well. It hasn't actually got a melody or a lyric yet but it think it may become "Skin hunger".

*Album2 is gonna be the working title even though I have a proper title for it. I'm just not telling yet.

As nothing much is happening in my life at the moment I don't really have anything to tell you & I'm not in story-telling mood but I do feel all interactive & like I want to do something bloggy.
So, because I can't think of anything new, does anyone fancy another round of Ask Flash?

I really enjoyed it last time & now there's so many more of you.
Here's the deal then, if you wanna play (whoever you may be) just ask me a question in the comments & I'll endeavour to answer it with wit, wisdom & honesty. Failing that I'll just answer it!

And by the way, I'm so giddy about being called "sweet superhero" that I wish it was MY birthday. Bless ya Spins!

Come on then, let's 'ave it!

"I could've ruined it, I'm such a twat"

Swiss has nailed it.
I've over-reacted & I'm sorry.
I just feel so fucking angry today & it's making me more angry that I don't know why.

I would delete the last post but there's a first time commenter on there so I can't.

I don't have an outlet for my anger. I have nobody to shout at, nobody to have a big fight with.
It's weirdly frustrating. By my very nature, I try extremely hard not to upset anyone. This means I have lots of people who like me & few that don't. I can't just go flying off at the people who like me because they may not like me anymore if I did.
What's a fella to do? It's not like it's a common or recurring problem. Anger & rage are about as familiar to me as having sex.

I'm sorry for any upset caused. You are all my friends & you all have lots of credit in bank of Flash.

"Shout Shout let it all out"

I feel a little strange today.
There is no logical reason for it but I feel a bit angry.
I could really enjoy having a proper slanging match with someone. When I get like this I can actually physically feel it in my eyes. They feel like they are about a fifth of the way to tears. They feel ultra focused.
I have had a pleasant enough day. I went to The Boy's sports day, he won the bat & ball race. He was so chuffed. Not that competition is encouraged in schools anymore. No, we don't want kids to learn about that do we? To learn that not everyone will get a promotion at work, not everyone will have their talents or efforts recognised, not everyone can win. Instead we let them blissfully grow up in a world where there are no winners or losers. I'm sure it's meant well & that psychologists will tell me that it has untold benefits. It just doesn't sit right with me.

This isn't related to my current state of mind but it does make it a little easier for me.
I am disappointed in some of you (with 2 exceptions), I don't know, maybe I don't have the right to chastise you & maybe I shouldn't (the last thing I want is any of you to think "Well, fuck you Flash, I won't bother reading anymore"). I do feel saddened that only 2 of you wished your fellow commenter & reader a happy birthday yesterday. I know that some of you may not have stopped by yesterday, I know that some of you may feel that you are new-ish here & dont really know the DOJ & I know I'm probably sounding as dislikable as I ever have but there are certain members of my "readership" who I expected better of.

Have I gone too far?
Do I have a right to moan?
Am I being a twat?
Does anybody want an argument?
Will I have any readers tomorrow?

I better put a lid on it, eh?
I'll set Humbert to play me nothing but Nine Inch Nails & I will literally shout it all out.

"How will I ever find my way home?"

It's never a bad thing to find new blogs to read, right?
With that in mind & because I like an experiment now & again, it's time to have a go at The 6 degrees of Blogeration as pioneered by Swiss Toni.

For those of you not in the know, the plan is to take six steps away from here via people's links & then find a way back here using a different route.
For the purpose of getting started I've chosen the 6th commenter on my last post as a place to kick off, that of course was SouthEast London's tidy-arsed Harry Potterite; Charby.

Next I'll choose a link on her Bloglist. Despite being enticed by Tittybiscuit, I'm going for Ruggywrites cos my old school mate The Gentle Giant was known as Ruggy (because of the presence of a deep pile carpet on his head).
Now known as Spazzymoto's revenge, the author has been rudely awakened to witness a dripping tap. This has not made her happy & amid much excellent swearing she is also quite concerned about the neighbours seeing her undergarments. I do fear for the EFL character who is in line to have the world's tiniest washing machine forcibly introduced to their rectum.

Anyway, time to move on & from the frankly gargantuan list of links I have been seduced by Chuffing Heck.
I shall say right here, right now I like Chuffing Heck. Dubs, the author, has a very amusing way with words & has made me chuckle several times. The experiment as already proved fruitful & I'll be going back to this fella again. Here's a couple of snippets.
On beating the French to the Olympics: "Am I alone in wanting to see Chirac's face when he was told of the result? We're talking a Portillo moment here. M. Chirac is blessed with a particularly expressive face which one can only imagine going through the internal agony of having lost to the British : a bit like a haddock in a suit slipping out a wet fart. My only real sadness is that it isn't on film."

Tennis: "And why are the standards for being considered "A Character" so low in tennis? John McEnroe was famed for his outbursts but there are far more creative tantrums played out dozens of times over one week of the football season. Jimmy Connors was considered an amusing man because he would occasionally pull a funny face at the crowd. If the Krankies had played mixed doubles, they would be considered gods today."

It's reet good stuff & he dwells in Yorkshire. Ace.

He doesn't however have a list of links but I found a link & followed that for part 3 of the journey.
That led me to JonnyB's private secret diary. An expose of Norfolk village life, JonnyB's blog seems perfectly fine & may well be worth further investigation. Much blood was spilt in the creation of his most recent post. Some by "perhaps the most rubbish mugger in the entire history of that activity, who took one look at me, started an exchange of pleasantries then fell off the kerb, injuring himself badly in the process" & some by a friend who had "accidentally nailed her hand to the garden wall"! In the interests of time, a more in-depth nose will have to wait for another day.

Onwards to step 4 then.
All's well, Jezebel being my next port of call.
Jezebel is a self proclaimed "future sensation (with an overactive imagination). Her friend was robbed at a stand up comedy competition for women by a man (sort of), she also got dead jammy & ended up in the Gold circle at Live8.
Her links are very big, & feature a lot of the same one's I've been seeing since I left Charby's place. I feel like I've just landed in a different circle. It's all quite time consuming too & I still have 2 more steps to take before I can even think about getting back to my place.

Next up then; Unlucky man.
Living up his name, I find nothing immediately jumps out at me & my patience is at wafer thin level, so I swiftly move on. I do feel quite bad for not exploring much though.

Right. No.6. My destination. A bit council.
Now I'm sorry but I didn't even finish one post. It may all be good stuff but when a man in his thirties writes without capital letters & paragraphs, etc. I don't feel I can invest my time trying to decipher it.

Now I have to get home. I have a problem here. A bit council only links to one other blog & that is JonnyB's private secret diary. So I shall return to Unlucky man & choose another link from there, ok?

Turns out this was an absolute masterstroke times 2.
A free man in Preston appears to be an exceedingly good blog. I only read 2 posts but it was well written, well observed & funny. I'll be going back there too.
And in his links I spied Danger! High postage, which I know Swiss links to. Let's hope it works both ways.

It does (& Lordy B too) & they link to me. So I'm home! Huzzah.

In conclusion, it's a bit of a drawn out process & the fifth & sixth sites you go to probably have to be really eyecatching to stand a chance. That said, I know I've found at least 2 new blogs that I can see myself reading all the the time & maybe a couple more after some further browsing.
So it's all good news really, eh?
********************************

Now I'd like all readers new & old to join me in wishing my oldest surviving friend & top notch commenter, The one & only Duke Of Jokes, a very, very happy 35th Birthday.
All together now...
Happy birthday to you.....

"I've tried to fix it so many times but there's something wrong with my mind"

Yesterday was my son's birthday. The Boy is now 6.
He's been with me pretty much all weekend & it's been nothing short of wonderful. Even when he woke, full of wide-eyed wonder, asking if he could have his presents at 5am. Well, I couldn't say no.
Today has been a beautiful day, wonderful cloudless blue skies , the sun shining but not quite so hot that it gets yukky. We had a walk (!) & we found there was a bit of a fete down at the scout hut. We played crazy golf. I love crazy golf.

My mind has been extremely unfocused tonight. Standard Sunday evening behaviour* has been carried out to the letter. Yet instead of my usual doom & gloom, my head feels more moom & glood.

*The Boy goes home, long soak in bath (sometimes accompanied by a spliff), prepare Chicken Tikka Masala, eat in front of Joey, think of how to fill next 30 minutes while spending it watching 2 and a half men, watch Big brother, computer.

After Big Brother tonight, I had a second spliff (usually unheard of when I'm on my own), turned all the lights off, lied back on the sofa & listened to some music.
I just had I-tunes on shuffle. Those of you familiar with being stoned will know that music often sounds different under the influence.
Not nessercarily** better, but different.
The following has struck me during my little sonic adventure:
Supergrass' "Grace" has this almost constant electro-wibble undercurrant thing going on that I've never noticed before.

**My inability to spell all the variants of that bastard word has even flummuxed the spellchecker.

"Hand in my pocket" by Alanis Morissette was frighteningly good. Her vocal, though a tad whiny, is very powerful. I spend most of the song thinking of how I might cover it. Make it a bit faster, a bit harder & with more urgency, like you don't believe that everything will be fine, fine, fine.

How, during "Roll with it", my thoughts went "urgh, roll with it","You gotta roll with it, you gotta....hey it's a good tune", "Why do I keep running out of milk?","you know you're bloody desperate for some football when you spend half your Saturday night watching a meaningless pre-season friendly of a club you don't support", "oh good, something else has come on".

My shoulders move up & down as if independent from the rest of my body when Jamelia's "Superstar" comes on.

Of how The Supernaturals never ever fail to evoke nice memories & how I must post about my supernatural adventures one day.

Oh I do miss Easyworld.

Flash's top tip for the day- When engaging in the questionable pursuit of looking at pornography on the internet do not listen to Crowed house's "Hole in the river" as it features a strange male grunting noise that is very off-putting.

Right now, it's a toss up between trying Swiss Toni's 6 degrees of blogeration thing, doing Mr Mystic's meme or going to bed with Humbert.

Shit, I really think for anyone new round here that I should point out that Humbert is my I-pod.
Jeez, people would start thinking I could actually entice a human being into my bed!!

"I get so carried away, you brought me down to earth"

Just received this e-mail:

Thanks for the new lyrics, we won't be using your song this Sunday but we will keep you in mind for future Sundays.
Many thanks,
The harbinger of doom.

I'm pissed off now & I feel like a proper spaz for broadcasting it to you all only for me to fall flat on my face.
Sorry for getting you all giddy over nowt.

"I'm so excited, ooh weee, & I just can't hide it"

You may recall, a couple of weeks ago, me speaking of a plan.
A plan involving TV.
Well, that very plan is extremely close to coming to fruition.
I better explain, eh?

For my sins, I am a big fan of Big Brother. Some years back now Reckless, Dream Girl & myself composed a song about the show, just in jest. The song has such a fine melody that it later became a proper song: "Big lover".
Big Brother's Little Brother (a sort of sister show hosted by Dermot O'Leary) has been running a competition of sorts to get people to write an original song about that week's events & if good enough they are invited to perform the song live on BBLB's Sunday show.
We submitted our entry a couple of weeks ago.
This afternoon Reckless got a phone call from one of the show's researchers. Turns out we've been shortlisted for this Sunday's show. I've just got to get some revised lyrics together (which I'm gonna focus on after I've posted this) & send them off. As yet nothing is concrete but it sounds extremely promising. She also told him that if we didn't get on this week, we'd still be in the running for later weeks.
So this Sunday I may well be singing one of my own songs on national television!!!!!!

I hope my trans-Atlantic readers will still share in my excitement even though they won't actually see it. As for you lot here in Blighty, as soon as I know anything definite I will post the details.

WATCH THIS SPACE.

"Dark obsession in the name of love"

This may be boring for some, for which I can only say: hard cheese!!

Today I'm going to wax lyrical about love.
More specifically, a special love that has burned brightly for the best part of 25 years.
A love which, in all that time, has never diminished & undoubtedly never will.

It all started in 1981 when I was just 11 years old. The object of my affections flirted with me a little & I took note. I did however leave it at that.
In the summer of 1983, my love was re-energised but I still kept my distance.
In 1984 I fell hook, line & sinker. I fell truly, madly, deeply in love.

Figured it out yet?
That's right I fell in love with Depeche mode.




















I'd liked "New life" & "Just can't get enough" back in 81 & I'd really liked "Everything counts" in 83 but it was "People are people" that sealed the deal in March 84. I'd seen them perform it on TOTP & had been most impressed. I then saw them do it on The Tube & they also did "Told you so" which I'd never heard before but was great.
So "People are People" was acquired on 7", 12" & the On-USound remix 12". This was the start of the collecting period. I would regularly trawl through the record shops of West Yorkshire on a Saturday afternoon searching for anything Mode-related that I didn't have.
Anyway I needed an album to listen to. One Saturday afternoon I stole this from a shop in Bradford.























"Construction time again" contained the aforementioned "Told you so" & it also had "Everything counts" on it. It sounded fantastic, like music from another world! It had amazing sounds on it, like buckets being hit & stuff like that. It also contained some good songs. It made me interested enough to go out & get "Speak & spell" & "A broken frame", their 1st 2 albums. Both at the time were fine but now have dated quite badly & also paled compared to the later works. That said, "Leave in silence" is still wonderful.

Some months later, the single "Master & Servant" arrived. It did (& still does) piss all over "People are people". It became my favourite song ever for the next 3 years. Jesus, it had a pneumatic drill on it!! It's a great song & it was soon followed by a great album in the shape of "Some great reward".




















At it's time it was the most well rounded, complete work of art I'd ever heard. Every track had something about it. Alongside "M & S" came the utterly beautiful "Somebody" which can still bring tears to my eyes to this day. It also worked wonders as part of a charm offensive when I would serenade girls with it, Temper Tantrum for instance. "Blasphemous rumours" was the darkest thing I'd ever heard, both lyrically & musically. It's still a classic.

In the May of 1985 came my first buy-it-on-the-day-of-release moment, when the "Shake the disease" single came out. I still adore that song & remember just playing it over & over in my bedroom that first day.

March 17th 1986 saw the release of "Black Celebration"


















This was another quantum leap forward on the DM evolutionary scale. I remember Ridgely & I getting the bus into town & back during our school lunch hour so we could get our mits on it. We had music that afternoon & our music teacher (the finest teacher ever, fact!) let us listen to it in our lesson.
"Black celebration" showed the band to be growing. One of the key things with my relationship with Depeche Mode is that I feel they grew as a band in line with my growth as a person. "Just can't get enough" was perfect for a keen 11 year old just dipping his toe into a world of new music. Just as "Black Celebration" was spot on for a nearly-adult mind. The singles; "Stripped","A question of lust" & "A question of time" were & still are wondrous. The title track also stands as one of the greats. "Black Celebration" remains the only DM album to have a title track, fact fans!

In the autumn of 1987 came my finest moment of record buying ever. Now you need to understand that I wasn't the only DM nut in my circle of friends. The Duke Of Jokes, Ridgely & Gentle Giant were all huge fans too. There was always an element of competition involved, who had the most, who had the rarest item, etc. And who could get this first...















I wasn't working at the time so I went to town dead early. I was stood outside JAT records at 8.30 when they opened up.
"Blimey, you're keen!" says the geezer. I followed him into the shop, up to the counter and said "I'd like a copy of "Music for the Masses" on clear vinyl please"
"We haven't got it yet"
"What???????"
The guy must have seen the horror on my face.
"Why don't you come down to the securicor depot with me to pick it up?"
And that's just what I did.
He even let me open the box containing the albums.
I claimed my album at 8.45 a good 15 minutes before my rivals who had gone to EGS, Ha!
And what a great album it turned out to be. "Never let me down again" soon wrestled the title of favourite song ever from "M & S". "The things you said" was the saddest most moving thing I'd ever heard, especially the middle 8; "I get so carried away..." (sniff). Every track had something about it. "Strangelove", "Sacred", "Behind the wheel" (which actually sounded like you were in a car!), "Little 15" & "Nothing" remain firm favourites even now after 18 years.
By now we were all 17/18 & actually had money of our own so we all finally went to see the band live.
Depeche Mode live are a revelation. One would be forgiven for thinking that 3 blokes behind keyboards & a singer would produce a poor visual spectacle. However, when that singer is Dave Gahan things change. Dave is a truly inspiring frontman who can charm crowds of thousands to act upon his every whim. He is a whirling dervish of energy & I very much wanted to be him. He had become a god in my eyes.
At the time of "Music for the masses" there was a worrying trend developing. Despite the fact that over 7 years & 6 albums they had morphed from plinky plinky synth pop merchants into an innovative, mature, confident musical force chart positions were steadily declining. "Never let me down again" somehow only limped to No.22. (No.2 in Germany, fact fans!)
Then in the summer of 1988 they finished the "Music for the Masses" world tour in the Pasadena rose bowl, Los Angeles in front of a sell out crowd of over 70000!
So while their native UK was shunning them the rest of the world were beginning to take notice.

Then in 1990 this happened...















"Violator" went onto change Depeche Mode forever. It's lead single "Personal Jesus" had everyone pricking up their collective ears & the follow up "Enjoy the Silence" remained in the uk top 10 (peaking at No.6) for weeks. Rightly so, after all it's a perfect piece of music. It has for 15 years now (give or take the few months when Radiohead stole in) held the title of favourite song ever. "Violator" itself was a masterwork of immense proportions. Every track (except "Blue dress") being genuinely fantastic. It also completely enraptured the world. At that time there was no bigger UK band in the world. U2 being Irish, of course. The only worry now was how would they follow "Violator"

3 years later that question was answered emphatically with "Songs of faith & devotion"





















This album even shocked me! It was a new Depeche mode. A Depeche mode that rocked a bit, a depeche mode that had a gospel choir, a depeche mode that had a new Dave Gahan even. He looked so different, the long hair, the beard, the plethora of tattoos & he sounded different too. "Condemnation" is, in my humble opinion, the best vocal performance Mr.G has ever given. A truly brilliant album, "SOFAD" was more than the sum of it's parts. And in "Walking in my shoes" they had nailed the quintessential DM song. If any one asked me what Depeche mode were all about, then that's the one song I'd play them. "Songs of faith of devotion" remains la creme de la creme of DM's albums for me.
Again I went to see them on the Devotional tour & it was bliss on a stick! Even down to Alan Wilder getting behind a kit & bashing out some REAL drums.
Of course, the Devotional tour is where it all went wrong. Fletch had a nervous breakdown, Martin drank heavily & eventually Alan left the band. A blow from which I fear they'll never recover. All this was nothing compared to what our intrepid frontman was up to. Heroin addiction that infamously culminated in him being "dead" for a few minutes after overdosing on a speedball (Cocaine & Heroin). For the first time ever I feared that Depeche mode had "reached it's natural conclusion".

Then all of a sudden in 1997 they were back in the top 5 with "Barrel of a gun" soon to be followed there by the sublime "It's no good". These singles were culled from the album; "Ultra"














"Ultra" is a strange beast. The aforementioned 2 singles plus "Home", "Useless" & "Love thieves" were fabulous. Sadly the rest of it was pretty much plop. It was the first time in 17 years that they had failed to better their previous effort & it was disappointing. However, I was just happy that they had survived & were still making music.

In 2001 we were offered "Exciter".
















Though it was a much more balanced album than "Ultra", it only had the 2 really high points. Situated at either end of the album "Dream on" & the soft caress of "Goodnight lovers" were good enough to have been on any DM album. That said, "Exciter" also boasted the god awful monstrosity "The dead of night".

Then we got Dave Gahan's solo album "Paper monsters" which had it's moments ("Dirty sticky floors" wouldn't have been out of place on either "Violator" or "SOFAD"). I went to see him on his solo tour. He played with a full proper band. Y'know; guitar, bass, drums. When they played some old DM tunes I was orgasmic. "A question of time" rocked like a gargantuan rocking thing!

And now we're on the cusp of Depeche Mode's 10th studio album; "Playing the angel". Again we are guaranteed some new ground as Dave has contributed to the songwriting for the first time. Apparently they filmed a video for the 1st single (rumoured to be "Precious") in London a couple of weeks back. This is why I'm starting to get excited, because they are coming back again.
I consider myself extremely lucky to have been a life long fan of Depeche Mode & even more fortuitous that even after 24 years I've never had to suffer the pain of my favourite band splitting up.

I'm sorry if it's been a dull read for any of you but I LOVE DEPECHE MODE. They are a part of me.
I'd now like your thoughts on DM, your favourite song, any great memories or even reasons why you don't like them.
Such as severe mental illness.

"Why does it comes as a surprise to think that I was so naive"

I was a couple of months over 14 when I went on a school trip to Amsterdam.
I remember acting the goat for pretty much the whole journey. The 6 hours on the coach to Harwich & the 8 hour ferry crossing.
I also remember the first thing we did upon arrival was to go on a canal boat cruise of the city.
I slept through the whole thing & my mirror lensed shades ensured that no one actually noticed.
Our stay in the city was for all of about 6 hours & that was about 2 of them already gone.
I then proceeded to do nothing much except look round record shops & play video games in the amusement arcades. I didn't seek out the notorious red light district because we'd been told that we'd get into serious trouble if we did. I later learned that Mr.Perv had taken a group of boys on a tour of the area. Bollocks.
Before I knew it, it was time to board the coach for the journey home.
I must have been about 10 feet away from the bus when I was stopped by a very tall & imposing fella.
"You want any gear?"
"Eh?"
"You want some gear?"
"Gear?"
"Yeah, gear. You know, gear, stuff"
"Gear? What like clothes?"
Now getting quite exasperated "GEAR, STUFF"
"..." blank expression
"Marijuana!"
"Ooooh NO!"
He sloped off & I ran to the bus squealing "Miss! Miss! Someone just tried to sell me drugs!!!"

A couple of years later, I 'd not long left school & my friend Married A Proper Bitch had come up to Wakefield to stay for the week. We decided to pay a visit to Never Be Old.
Now, Never Be Old was one of my oldest friends. We used to walk to & from school together every day & we'd hang out most evenings.
His parents were just the coolest Mum & Dad ever. They used to let us do anything. I recall that they let us sit down with them one Saturday night to watch The Exorcist with them when we were about 12. They used to let me stay round there house till about 11pm before they'd finally suggesting that I should go home. The dad had a plastic arm which was intensely fascinating to me, as was the fact that he never had a job the whole time I knew them. I'd ask Never Be Old how they got by for money. He said that his Dad had a system that meant he could "earn" enough money at the bookies. OK.
When I'm round Reckless & Dream Girl's house I'm often reminded of being at Never Be Old's when I was a lad. Dream Girl's eldest, Scared Of Haircuts, has a mate that always comes round. He's annoying & lovable in equal measure & he reminds me of myself at that age to a frightening degree. The way he interacts with Reckless, Dream Girl & myself, the way that we just know that he's not a bad kid but that he's quite mischievous when out of our sight. Oh my, he's like a little mini-me. He even has similar hair.
Ooh, not like me to digress, eh?
Anyway, it'd been a few weeks since I'd last seen Never Be Old when Married A Proper Bitch & I called round. He welcomed us in & we went up to his room to hang out. He was acting a little bit odd, nothing I could put my finger on but just a bit off. We chatted a bit & eventually we got on to subject of what he'd been upto since finishing school. He said he hadn't done much because he'd been smoking dope.
WHAT???
Married A Proper Bitch & I exchanged worried glances as he went on to explain how it wasn't a bad thing.
"What's it do then?" I enquired.
He told us that it made him feel happy & at peace. He said that if he'd had some & we hadn't that we would be on different wavelengths. That we would seem boring to him.
We left shortly after that (I've never liked being called boring) & walked back to my house.
"Shit man, Never Be Old's a junkie"
"I know, shit"
We were shocked to our very core & wondered the rest of the way back in silence.

Of course, now when I look back it's very easy to see why Never Be Old's folks were so cool. I only ever saw Never Be Old once more after that day.
I'd love to see him again, he was a great friend of mine through our formative years & we hardly ever had a cross word.
I hope he's ok, I'd like to share a spliff with him now.
And his Mum & Dad.

"Dazed, beautiful & bruised"

I'm sorry, it appears I've been neglecting you.
It's all about timing.
I was gonna post on Thursday but I couldn't bring myself to talk about the thing that made me say "That was the most frightening thing I've experienced in a long time" after what happened in London on Thursday morning. It just was not appropriate.Since then I simply haven't been at home long enough to post.

So Reckless was nagging me about how I shouldn't abandon all hope for the Flashmobile. He thinks I can pick another engine up for under a ton & that he's capable of fitting it. Of course this meant going to fetch the flashmobile back from Leicester forest east service station. We had a nice drive up there, it's not very often that we spend time together without anyone else about & we had quite a laugh.
Reckless (Hey that's his name kids!) let me drive his car while he skinned up.
Then we smoked it.
Then we became very stoned (it's good shit we've got at the mo!).
Honestly, neither of us realised what a very silly thing we were doing & I don't think even Reckless foresaw just how stoned we would get.
So we hung around the services a bit & straightened up a bit.Then it was time.Reckless attached the tow rope to our respective cars, gave me a little pep talk on how to be towed & we slowly moved off to join the police escort that he'd already secured for us. They only took us up the service road out of there but, hey you want drama, right?
Anyway the police waved us off & we were now on the queen's highway. I was rigid with fear & concentration. To such an extent that I didn't even plug Humbert in. I know!!!
We wove across from Leicester to Hinckley, at one point we got up to about 55mph & I was bricking it. I actually had my foot on the brake pedal for the whole journey & could smell them burning at one point. We then got on the A5 which meant a nice straight road practically the whole way back to Crapsville. It also meant Reckless could increase his average speed thus decreasing the chance of me relaxing even a little tiny bit. Honestly folks, following a car at 75mph when you are only 6 feet behind it will make you about as unrelaxed as you can get.Eventually we got back to Crapsville & I got out of my little car, still shaking & made the proclamation above.
I really was so very scared, real proper fear but I'm sure it was nothing like the fear people must have felt only 70 miles down the road that morning. So I hope you dig why I elected not to post on thursday. I'm genuinely sorry if my absence caused any worry amongst you all.

Friday was just work, The Boy & my usual consumption of Vodka over at Reckless & Dream Girl's house.

Saturday was a good day. It was Small Doses (Funny Dance's brother) stag day. The plan was a whole day of Paintballing & then a piss up in Northampton. I had paid for Reckless to come paintballing for a belated birthday present for him as I knew he'd always wanted to go. Sadly Funny Dance himself didn't make it. He had some cartrouble of his own whilst down in Somerset on Friday & couldn't get home. He's still not back yet, though he has just phoned & he's now on his way & he's gutted at missing his brother's stag do.The paintball place was down near Banbury & was quite different from the last one I went to. In one way in particular.This quote from the last time I went : "I got shot many times myself & think I got lucky because none of them really hurt. I'd been told that it stung like fuck!".
Hmmph.
Today I am sporting a colossal purple bruise on my right thigh, a quite nasty double bruise just under my right shoulder, a bruise on my right wrist (don't worry it won't affect my sex life!), one under my right manboob & I ache all over. Oh they really bloody hurt this time.
However, it was cracking fun. I got well into it & about halfway through the day my great moment of heroism happened. I captured the flag.There I am alone behind a big tree. I've managed to pick off a couple of charlies from the reds so I find myself in view of the bridge in a very quiet area, I send off a couple of shots at the tin hut to see if I could draw the sniper's fire. No sniper. Then I make a bolt for the tin cubicle type thing on the edge of the bridge. There is another one on the adjacent side of the bridge & one of my platoon appears from the trees & runs into that one.
"Cover me" he shouts
"I'm outta ammo" I say "Wait there"
I run across to him, dodging a couple of bullets en route."I've got no bullets, so you cover me" with that I went scurrying to the middle of the bridge, expecting any second to be cut down in a hail of little orange balls. None emerged & unchallenged I proudly held the flag above my head and hear the marshall proclaim "Blue team wins". My soldier buddy who covered me, comes up, puts his arm round me, rubs my head & drapes the flag round me. We stride into the safezone to be greeted like heroes. Which of course we were.
By now I felt like I was a marine or Rambo or something. This carried on till the final game, with only a handfull of bullets left it was time for Hunt the Stag. All of us (12) against 1. In the end it became 8 versus 4. I was on the 8. We collectively decided we would make use of our numbers & just rush them.
So we charged.
I perhaps charged a bit more enthusiastically then the rest of them. For as I ran, giving it some "AAAAARRRRGGGGHHHH" & indiscriminately firing my gun in their general direction I felt that now familiar short sharp pain ripping through my shoulder. "Fuck"Then again."FUCK"then in the space of only a second or two; again & again & again & again & again & again.
I was being fucking liquefied out there.
And I was dancing like a thriller era Michael Jackson.
And I swore more than a particularly badass rapper, with Tourette's.
And I ran away.
Turns out I got mown down in my prime because I was the only one charging.
Bastards.
Though it's a lot of fun, paintballing has a big downside: It costs shitloads to buy more bullets & you have to buy them cos without bullets there's no point being there. Subsequently Reckless & I bowed out of the evening piss up on financial grounds.
We just got pissed at his, sweet.
Today has been fairly evenly split between driving to & from Northampton (Funny Dance lent me his other car while in Somerset) & aching.

Before I go I'd just like to go back to bruises a minute. When I showed Dream Girl my leg bruise she winced but said "It's nowhere near as bad as your tambourine bruise though". She was right. My Tambourine bruise was literally the size of a football spanning the whole of the outer side of my upper leg. It was acquired by having a bit of a jam with Reckless. Mic in one hand & tambourine in the other. Without noticing or feeling any pain I played it against the side of my leg for about an hour. God it was a beauty!If anyone else has any impausablely-acquired bruise stories, do tell!

Oh & by the way, it's exactly one year ago today since I last had sex.
Shit.

"I just don't know what to do with myself"

So I finished work at 2pm.
The Boy has gone to one of his friend's today.
I'm chuffing bored.

I tried making some music but I don't seem to have the patience today.
I've read everyone's blogs.
I've got nothing to blog about (especially not how I had a little squeeze of one of Nice Not Hot's* breasts at work today).
I'm sick of sitting in front of the computer anyway (which also rules out starting that book).
There is bugger all on telly that I want to watch till 10 o'clock.
I can't go anywhere because I haven't got a chuffing car.
The only thing that remotely takes my fancy is watching my recently acquired Trainspotting DVD while eating some yummy Chicken tikka masala & having a nice fat spliff.
That will only account for 2 hours though...(sigh)

*Official World of Flash notice: Nice Not Hot will now be known as Nice.
She may well not be hot but she's such a sweety that I feel like I'm insulting her every time I type it, so Nice it is.

"I will (erm, won't actually) try to fix you"

By 'eck I'm reet cream-crackered!

As you may already have read; myself, Lordy B & Swiss Toni went to Bolton.
We had a good old chin wag on the way up there, we picked our all time (well, in our lifetimes) England team* & somehow arrived in the car park listening to Def Leppard. Readers, I want you to know I had no part in that choice.
Them two? Perhaps the air's thinner up there! Only kidding guys.

*1. Seamen
A back 4 of...
G.Neville
Pearce (who else? Not even the great Tony Dorigo)
Butcher
Ferdinand (I think, though I recall lobbying for Sol Cambell & noting that if Jonathon Woodgate were not a walking accident he would knock them all into a cocked hat)
A midfield of...
Robson
Gazza
Waddle
Beckham
& a strikeforce of...
Lineker
Shearer

Anyway, upon arrival at the Reebok stadium were we greeted by Lord Bargain's brother & torrential rain. We proceeded into the stadium & it felt quite bizarre to me to be standing right in the middle of Bolton Wanderer's pitch. People were sitting in the dug out! I wanted a go but I never did.

Before I go on to Coldplay I'd just like to make the following statement: All 3 of my companions are utter top men & I thoroughly enjoyed their collective company despite feeling like their pet gnome!

Elbow were the support but they did little for me, I'm sure were it not for the driving rain I may have mustered a bit more enthusiasm for them. There is a photo over at Swiss Toni's place taken at this time.

Coldplay were quite simply stupendous. I feel honoured to have witnessed a band at the peak of their powers. My highlights were "Politik", "God put a smile upon your face" (which had a great wig out sci fi ending type thing going on), "The scientist" (which due to the very personal associations I have with that song caused 2 things to occur: 1. I very nearly cried, 2. I became a borderline fruitloop for in my head I was thinking "Yeah all you thousands can sing it & think it moves you but it doesn't move you like it moves me!", I realised I was being a twat before it finished), "Clocks" (which isn't one of my big faves at all but it sounded mesmeric & masterful), "Talk", "In my place" & "Fix you". They actually played "Fix you" twice because they were filming a video for it's forthcoming single release. Chris Martin did ask us very nicely so it would have been rude not to. Actually a trickle of people left after the first play of it, bloody loonies.
In short; it was ace!

We returned to the car & said farewell to Lordy B's bruv. Then one of Humbert's cousins decided to heap shame upon it's owner. I suggested that we should have Lordy B's pod on shuffle & see what comes out. Oh, how we laughed. For details of the tunes so foul that they can't be mentioned here on my *ahem* cultured pages, go here.
Oh the shame!!!!

Getting home proved to be a bit of a troublesome trek & we arrived back in Nottingham at around 3am. I said my goodbyes & jumped into the Flashmobile. Just before joining the M1 I noticed a nasty little knocking sound coming from the vicinity of the engine. Then the oil light came on so bright that I fear it may have done lasting damage to my retinas.
"Ok the services are less than a mile away, I'll get you some oil, just hold together"
As the last word leapt from my lips there was a bang followed swiftly by a plume of smoke & the loss of all power from the engine. I pulled onto the hard shoulder just in front of the sign saying: services - one third of a mile.
I opened the bonnet & was quite dismayed to see flames, small ones but flames nonetheless.
I soon put them out with the use of some flat diet coke.
Now as a fully paid up member of the League of Stupid People it shouldn't come as a surprise to learn that I don't have breakdown cover.
I know, I know, don't nag me!
Purely because of my close proximity, the old bill came along & towed me & my stricken vehicle to the services. It was now 4am. I set my alarm on my phone for 8 & snuggled down for a brief kip in the car. At 8, I phoned Funny Dance who (god bless him) made himself late for work to come & rescue me. I finally got home at 9.30. I've since had the company of Buddy With Boobs & The Boy till now I am free to totally relax (for relax read get totally fucking shitfaced) for the evening.

In summation then, A top night in the company of some top geezers watching a top band on top form. And then a big old pile of steaming plop.
The prognosis for the Flashmobile??
I'm sorry there is nothing we can do, the Flashmobile is dead.

"More blood than a backstreet dentist"

I bloody hate shaving.
This is why I can often be seen sporting at least 2 or 3 days growth.
Up until an hour ago I have a week's worth on my mug, almost a beard.
The reason for this stems from one in a long line of poor shaving-related decisions I made a week or so ago.
I was in Tesco doing my shopping when I actually remembered that I needed new razor blades.
I hate buying razor blades more than I hate shaving itself. They are so ridiculously expensive.
This (as Reckless would back me up) leads to the silliest method of "saving" money. The practice of buying a brand new razor which is usually a couple of quid cheaper than a pack of blades. Of course the new razor only comes with 2 new blades & before you know it one's bathroom is awash with loads of razors but nothing but blunt blades on all of them. I currently have 5 different razors.
Then my gaze fell upon a new solution. Tesco's own 3 blade "shaving system" complete with 5 blades for only a couple of quid. Hurrah!
Tesco's own brand stuff seems to be ok in general so razors would be no different, right?
Wrong!
My first shave using said razor resulted in me losing so much blood that if I'd have gotten a stiffy at the same time I would have passed out.

"We all try hard to live our lives in harmony"

So what's been going on in world of Flash since we last got together eh?
Not much, to be honest.
The plan has been executed & put into action, though we were a little bit late for it to work this week. Still there's always next week. I'd love to tell you all the details but I'd love it even more if I could just come out & say: Right everybody make sure you watch this, then, on that channel.
I feel it will have greater impact that way.
Trust me.

The plan consumed pretty much all of Wednesday & Friday evenings & then yesterday I spent the whole day in front of the telly round at Reckless & Dream Girl's. I was of course watching Live8. We all enjoyed it immensely.
My personal views are thus:


I missed most of U2 but I did catch "Vertigo" which was mega.

Coldplay underwhelmed me a tad & the appearance of Richard Ashcroft for a performance of "Bittersweet symphony" left me a bit cold too, despite it being, on paper at least, a fantastic idea.

I thought Elton was plop & so was his junkie mate.

I have no time for Dido in general but I did enjoy "7 seconds" with Youssou N'Dour. I've always liked that song though.

Now perhaps I'm a little biased but I thought Stereophonics were on top form. It was a fine choice of songs & they seemed to me to be the first band to get everyone rocking.
"Dakota" was sublime.

REM? You just can't knock 'em, eh? "Everybody hurts" was nothing short of spine-tingling.

Miss Dynamitee-ee gave me an opportunity to nip to the shop to stock up on fags & vodka, for which I can only thank her. Good work missy!

Keane pulled it off, didn't they? "Bedshaped" was utter class.

Travis. Now as Swiss Toni rightly mentioned in a recent comment, Fran & the boys have gone very, very bland of late. I didn't hold out much hope, even less when Mr.Healy came on dressed as a gypo & then proceeded to murder "Sing" which is one of my favourite Travis songs. Then they played "Side" which is not very good. However the lyric had the right message & they then turned it into "Staying alive"!!!! Marvelous! A crowd pleasing singalong of "Why does it always rain on me?" later & they'd snatched a memorable victory from the jaws of defeat. Fair bloody play!

Bob then did his bit which, come on, we all would do in the same position. And it's still a great song.

Annie Lennox & UB40 held no interest for us so we went into the kitchen to make tea.

Snoop Dogg is not my cup of tea at all, but I thought his set was blinding! Really enjoyed it much to my surprise.

I was a bit worried for Razorlight, being perhaps the most junior of the bands on show. Johnny Borrell clearly wasn't fazed at all because they delivered a rip-roaring performance. Absolutely fantastic & the crowd seemed to be well into it. I would not be surprised too see their profile rocket after that set.

Madonna: She's not the queen of pop for nothing, eh?
Prior to her coming on all 3 of us had active tear ducts when the beautiful young woman came onto the stage, the woman who we'd seen 20 years ago, diseased & emaciated on the film that famously was backed by The Car's "Drive". A truly moving way of illustrating that our voices can & do sometimes work.

Snow patrol were lukewarm, Gary Lightbody seemed to be dying with nerves! "Run" seemed to get them back on track though & when interviewed coming straight off the stage you just wanted to give him a big hug, bless him.

It was a travesty that The Killers only got to do one song but, crikey, did they choose the right one, or what? With just "All these things that I have done" they played a blinder.

In truth, from that point on, there wasn't much left on the bill to get us too excited. I'm just not into Pink Floyd or The Who. Sorry.

One more performance was to come that I found spellbinding. I make no apologies for it either.
Robbie Williams is a consummate performer. I felt a little wistful while watching him getting the whole park* eating out of his hand.
See in the grand scheme of things I always wanted to be like Robbie. Fuck credibility, Fuck the fawning praise of people like me heaped onto the cool, obscure little bands that make excellent music that nobody hears & Fuck being B, C or Z list.
The dreams I had of being a famous singer when I was much younger always pretty much looked like what Robbie did last night.
There I've said it.

*I know this fella was there & I can't imagine for one second him falling under the spell of Robbie.

The star of the latter half of the show had to be Peter Kay though, He had us pissing our collective pants!

I did watch the rest of it, except for the hour when Big Brother was on, & though I could appreciate what a massive thing it was for some to see Floyd,etc it just didn't move me.

The event as a whole did though & I now sincerely hope it has the desired effect on those 8 men in Edinburgh this week.

All that remains now is to look forward to tomorrow's trip to Bolton to see Coldplay with Lordy B & Swiss Toni. I'm 100% positive that I will not be underwhelmed by them this time!


Moving on to more personal things; a couple of noticable anniversaries passed on Friday, July 1st. It was 17 years to the day that I first left the bosom of my family & moved out of my home, my home town aswell. I moved to Crapsville - Doh!
It was also 3 years to the day since I left Temper Tantrum. Now there's a desicion I have never ever regretted & I'm damn sure I never will - Hurrah!

Though the likelihood is remote to say the least, if any of you ever end up sharing a home with me you better keep a close eye on me come the first day of July!